chemistryfreak

Seriously, people

2011-12-28T11:36:00.003+08:00

If your boyfriend/girlfriend or simply your other half is abusing you for some reasons, just walk out of the relationship. Stop the abuse. We only have a limited set of time in our lifetime. Don't waste your time on such people. There are others who deserve more of your precious time.

I don't understand why some people post something on facebook, wanting people to know but not wanting people to comment. Because when someone commented back, the poster will reply 'none of your business' or he will try and change the topic. I mean, seriously, then what is the point of putting it on facebook.

Maybe I am having pre-exchange jitters, that's what's up with all the ranting.

But seriously people, keep your dirty laundry at home. Stop arguing about your relationship on social media.

On a happier note, there's lot of things to be done today. Photoshoot, Titanic museum and followed by the long awaited 'WICKED the Musical'!!!!!!!!! OMG!!! I have been waiting to watch WICKED for a very very very long time!

Laskar Pelangi

2011-10-03T01:19:00.002+08:00

They are really very warm and welcoming! I totally felt like being part of the big family. Thank you Laskar Pelangi for the wonderful journey!

2011-07-01T10:41:00.001+08:00

HELLO EVERYONE!

BLOGGING FROM KOREA NOW.

SUPER THANKS TO JAE HYUNG AND RACHEL FOR BRINGING ME AROUND KOREA! ITS REALLY AWESOME.

WHAT EVER HAPPENED IN SINGAPORE WILL STAY IN SINGAPORE. WHAT EVER HAPPENED IN KOREA WILL STAY IN KOREA.

HAHA

2011-03-03T00:51:00.001+08:00

Act like the whole world owns you something. And the world might just do that to you.

2011-02-12T19:34:00.001+08:00

We are going to rock the F1 pit for chingay in the next 30 mins.

2011-02-10T13:58:00.001+08:00

What is the problem with these suicide bombers?

2011-01-13T00:03:00.001+08:00

Are you really that miserable? If not why are you behaving like a miserable old man?

2011-01-10T00:33:00.002+08:00

I really feel that I am getting old...

I know there are people around me who will listen to me... but...

2010-12-31T09:53:00.004+08:00

It was the best way to end the exams, in fact, this is the first time in my life I actually had to take an exam on my birthday.

Holidays have started, and I am busy to the max, even busier than without the holidays. Here's a summary of what I did for the past 7 days... Birthday celebrations with the red cross aka study group peeps, chun long, azrul and the crazy choir people, christmas caroling practices and performance, planning of choir leadership workshop, Chingay parade rehearsal, meeting up with people I have not seen in ages, and a wedding. It was so packed that I didn't have time to plan the 2nd week of my holidays. I think there are starting to have some clashes...

I thought I wouldn't be worried about university stuff during the holidays, but certain things I did has come back to haunt me. Not just regular haunting. In fact is very problematic. But its alright, there's a probably a reason why I have to go through this.

Now, I am just going to rest on new year's day. No countdown on eve either. Just going to rest.

2010-12-16T01:38:00.002+08:00

I am not sure what is wrong with you.

Either way, I have no obligations to entertain you should you seek to find me

2010-12-15T02:14:00.002+08:00

I must admit sometimes I am too quick at generating conclusions. But is there any wrong in that?

After today, I got 2 more to go!!!

2010-12-12T02:53:00.002+08:00

The wonders about supportive people around you, that makes the path of life much easier... which happens to make exams not seem so daunting...

2010-12-05T00:16:00.000+08:00

One day, when I cannot tahan your slamming problem, I will slam something into your face...

So early?!

2010-11-28T07:48:00.004+08:00

Today I woke up at 7.30am without any help from an alarm. It's a miracle actually plus I woke up without the lazy feeling of falling back to sleep. If my body is gonna operate like this over the next few days because I am feeling motivated, I think this is great news. Buf if my body operated like this because I was coughing non stop in the morning, I guess I wouldn't mind coughing everytime I need to wake up; its that effective.

Its a sunday morning and I here I am, waking up in NTU. It's the time of the year where I will be 'locking' myself up in my room.

If you would like to come all the way to NTU to bring me food, I would definitely appreciate it.

Other than that, see you all fellas after my exam!

Run away with me

2010-11-27T23:09:00.001+08:00

I always told my friends how I would not spoil my kids next time because I really cannot stand the sight of spoilt kids. And besides, I always believe in tough love. However, I realise that it could be easier said than done. When I was eating lunch with one of my juniors today, something struck me. In fact, he was eating his packed lunch which I think he made himself at home. At that instance, I felt compelled to buy him lunch.

At the end I didn't because I convinced myself about tough love. But what made me reflect was that I was still unsure on how I would treat my kids in future when I thought I knew how.

Anyway, its still long lah. I have already seen friends who are way younger than me having a higher probability of getting married first.

On another note, Justin and I attended Chun Long's CDC performance in PRSS choir room. I have to admit that I enjoyed myself throughout the entire performance. To say the least, I was really impressed. Even the actor who was supposed to be focused on his act was stalking me when he was off stage mentioned, "I can see that you enjoyed yourself."

It was really a job well done. And Ah Wang, don't worry. Although you did not win the best actor award, you will still be the best actor in our hearts! Haha. But... you were really horrible when it comes to left 4 dead 2. There's no team spirit! Looks like the leadership camp you attended did not sink in other learning points except having a sense of urgency.

I'm not good with words.
But that's nothing new.
Still I have to try to explain what I want to do.
With you. With you.
Run away with me.
Let me be your ride out of town.
Let me be the place that you hide.
We can make our lives on the go.
Run away with me.

2010-11-24T01:39:00.003+08:00

I really wish I have the courage to say, "I told you so...."

I guess I don't.

Or perhaps the intention to say it didn't cross my mind.

Or perhaps it was more of something which I read in the past mentioning that saying 'I told you so..." is the worse form of consoling people. However, neither am I in the mood of consoling you.

There are better things in life worth bothering about.

I don't believe in sympathy towards people who received their expected outcomes after making their choices. Unless you are refering to freak accidents which is something different to discuss.

Passion?

2010-11-19T02:21:00.004+08:00

Last weekend over family dinner before my brother books in to BMT and before I book in to NTU, my dad raised a question and it was a very random question. He asked me what was the reason I joined choir in primary school. I could not have been forced, because I would have quit and not stayed on from primary 2 to 6. It was so long ago and I could not think of any other reasons other than, 'I just want to sing and perform'.

So why the question? My dad said that being engaged in music is good food for the brain and the key to this is, it musn't be forced. And so this led to another conversation with regards to 'Why didn't you and mum send us to take piano lessons? If we had piano lessons, things would be much easier for us now.'

Mum thought that learning music was for girls. Dad said music lessons was for the rich people. And they both concluded that it was because they didn't want to force me and my brother to do things; they wanted us to explore life for ourselves which was pretty much their method of raising both me and my brother up. That is why for the past 20 years when we don't eat our vegetables, our parents do not threaten us in anyway even after trying to convince us that vegetables taste like french fries.

They didn't send us to music lessons, swimming lessons, or any other exotic classes for kids nowadays. They didn't force me to continue my abcacus class after I found it too boring too. Tuition classes were kept to a minimum because I don't really pay attention during tuition classes as well, except for chinese tuition which was fun. The only class they did sent us to was the Drawing Class at Fengshan Community Centre. The art class specialises in drawing human using circles which is still the same method I draw humans now. And the reason why we ended up in that class is because my parents thought drawing humans using circles is cute. I enjoyed those classes a lot with dunkin' donuts to follow after each session. However, I never had a flair in drawing and that interest did not grow beyond drawing in that style. But it did inspired my brother in some ways, he does have a flair for designing things now.

To end off the conversation, my mum said, 'You should be thankful we didn't send you to ballet classes!'

If she did at that time, I would probably hate it.

Which brings me to this question. If my parents did force us to learn music at such a young age, could it have made us hate it more? Instead, without the background in music, me and my brother are putting in effort now to learn music and other things which we did not learn since childhood.

So does making a kid learn something at a young age creates that passion? Or is passion something that must be grown from within naturally or even inspired.

Some food for thought eh.

Anyway if my parents want to send to me to ballet classes now, I would be more than willing to go! My performance starts in less than 48 hours!

2010-11-08T01:28:00.001+08:00

Nevertheless, as Elle Woods puts it, "Keep it positive!"

2010-11-07T23:55:00.000+08:00

My milk tea is not reaching thermal equilibrium with the inside of the fridge!

2010-10-30T15:13:00.003+08:00

I typed a rather lengthly post about some thoughts provoking issues. When I clicked on the 'Publish Post' icon, they said that an error has occured and my post was gone. Does it mean that I have to always save a copy everytime I want to publish a post?

2010-10-27T12:06:00.001+08:00

Watching video on Legally Blonde the Musical never fails to perk me up! If you like chic flicks and musicals, Legally Blonde the Musical has the both combination for you =)

2010-10-20T18:40:00.003+08:00

I was always constantly dreading the sight of physics and maths. To be honest, I feel that the modules of physics and maths which I am taking now are very difficult for me, for someone who has no affinity for formulas and numbers. My non-chalant attitude for these 2 subjects results in a very painful lesson last semester and I thought I would learn well from it. Since the start of year 2, it seems that I have forgot that lesson. If I do not pick myself up right now, I will be carrying out the same mistake and be trapped in this vicous cycle.

I am always complaining how I am left alone to struggle and fend for myself in this course but little did I realise that there are signs, pointing me to directions where I can seek help. Sadly, I was oblivious to them because I am always thinking of an escape plan.

Today I will stop all these nonsense. Yes, the modules are difficult but I will not give up. I will understand them and I will come to realise that it isn't that bad, that its all in the head.

I keep telling myself my brain is too saturated to learn new things but I stopped today. Here's my analogy...

Imagine your brain is like a unsaturated hydrocarbon, let's say an ethene molecule. When you gain new knowledge, the mental capacity of your brain grows, just like ethene forming ethane after hydrogenation; the molecule increases in mass. Now ethane (your brain) is saturated, and you cannot expand this molecule. That's true for high school chemistry. But as a chemistry major, I am telling you that you can indeed increase the molecule size. I can let it undergo free radical subsituition followed by Sn2 reaction of ethanol. Wala! Your ethane molecule has grown twice its size. Continue to do this reaction and it will keep growing! Whats more, there are so many more reactions to increase the size of molecules.

So in short, its bullshit to say that your brain is saturated. If a saturated compound like ethane can increase in size, why can't your mental capacity do the same as well?

Back from hiatus

2010-10-19T14:23:00.003+08:00

I am reaching mid-week of my 1 week holiday now and things has not been that productive. The subjects I am taking this semester is harder than I thought! I cannot study the way I used to study for my last year's subjects. If this goes on, my grades will definitely suffer and I might repeat these subjects. And right now, I need to catch up.

I hope there is nothing wrong with being "selfish". I realised I have been saying "NO" a lot of times recently because I realised that its important that you spare a thought for yourself once in a while. There's no point in making yourself so busy that everything else suffers.

I need to get a grip of myself and stay rooted. I need myself to know that I am studying in NTU, a chemistry major and I need to focus on studying and doing research. I am not studying arts in a theatre school now. Wanting to sing and dance on stage should come secondary. It's probably the monotomy of studying science which causes my to explore the other side where I can express myself freely. There's no form of expressive work in science from what I know now. Can I expect to synthesize a new compound base on my expressions? I doubt it will work. In short, I must do well in my chemistry major because my plans to enter a graduate medical school still holds. I met a doctor recently who meets patients at night, and take part in musical productions at night. He is an inspiration.

In fact, instead of dreading, I should embrace both sides and use them as my strengths; the science and the arts.

I am going to "jail" myself for the rest of this week, except for friday where I will be going back to PRSS to teach. It's their final week before the O levels. Afterwhich, I am going to"jail" myself in school whenever possible to focus on my holiday. I am sure it will not be that bad. At least I will get to have a more enjoyable winter holiday without worries about my results =)

2010-09-26T20:25:00.000+08:00

My jazz shoes!!! Actually I bought this like months ago. haha

2010-08-29T22:16:00.002+08:00

I'm starting school tomorrow after 4 months of holiday.

I am worried my studying engine is not working. In fact, I have not touch anything studies-related at all! And when I printed out my Maths notes just a while ago, I felt terrified. I don't feel like studying maths again. But I have to. Due to my unwillingness to study maths, I have to study maths for one more year. And this time, I better make the grade or I will be stuck in this horrible cycle of doom.

On the other hand, some part of me can't wait to start school. I want to faster graduate! I want to faster get my degree! Because I am thinking of greater plans after my graduation!

Watched Step Up 3 with YU, and its 3D somemore. It's not bad, the dances were awesome but the plot is ultimately cheesy. But yea, saw something in the movie that inspired me. One of the characters in the movie made the leap to talk to someone who was the head of his university to discuss about studying something that he like, engineering and dance. Just because of an email rejecting my application to study a particular minor, doesn't mean I should give up like that. I felt like I should do something about it instead of sitting on the bench. Because I know it can make my university life more meaningful.

Yep. I will be booking in tomorrow to my hall. My room mate still remains a secret character now. I probably have more time to upload photos when school starts. haha but not really lah. I want to start this year afresh! I want to chiong all the way! Watch out people!

2010-08-16T23:24:00.000+08:00

Today marks the official day of my 2+ years transformation. There's no turning back from today onwards.

2010-08-14T00:55:00.002+08:00

I went to esplanade library alone just now to hear the people from Musical Theatre Limited, singing songs from musicals. It was awesome and many times, it made me smiled just watching them perform the songs.

Then Yu asked me why I went to listen alone.

There is nothing wrong with going there alone.

Sometimes, I realised some things can get done faster if done alone. If you are going to find and wait for others, it becomes very inefficient.

Don't wait. Just do.

And if I have to do it alone, I will do it alone.

2010-08-10T22:32:00.002+08:00

Just came back from a 7 day symposium on Humanitarian Aid in Malacca! The people there were extremely awesome. And I still miss their company so much still!!

I learnt more things about NGOs and humanitarian work at large, and I am starting to have controversial thoughts about humanitarian aid. It was no longer what I thought it used to be. In certain words, it can be simply phrase as 'disappointing'.

More photos up soon.

Back to work at PRSS. Need to enjoy my last 2 weeks before I isolate myself in NTU for the upcoming academic year.

Auditions

2010-07-01T15:15:00.005+08:00

Some updates...

PRSS 25th Anniversary Concert. Thanks for coming down to support your school!

Universal Studios Singapore 2 Days Dance Workshop

Not only dancing, we also got to learn about singing, acting, and even how to do well during an audition.

It was fantastic to learn the moves from the musicals in universal studios no where better but universal studios itself. We even got to see the musicals live and managed to walk around a bit during our lunch time.

It was definitely eye opening and I am convinced to work there part time as an entertainer.

Anubis at the ancient Egypt.

Egyptian food for lunch.

Sound stage; the first in Singapore and its where we learn all our dance moves.

Universal Studios Singapore Audition at SMU.

Actually, I didn't think I would go for the audition. But after going through the workshop, I thought might as well put to practice what I have learnt. Anyway, auditions are free so there's no harm trying it out.

I am number 0240, and there were up to 300 of us.

We had to learn a hip-hop dance routine there and perform it on the spot in groups of five. No matter how much I try to recall the steps while waiting for my turn, I still forgot parts of the choregraphy. But I still danced like nothing happened. Haha.

Then we also had singing audition so I sang a verse from 'The Nicest Kids in Town' from Hairspray. It was bad because they could not use the minus 1 CD I prepared and so I have to sing it a cappella. And it was worse when I forgot the lyrics halfway. Haha, talk about panic attack. Then again, I just continued like nothing happened.

Me, Kyla and Priscilla; workshop buddies. I only found out they were from NTU during the audition day itself!

And yes, Justin Tit (long time no see) who was there to work part time in the audition process.

So I thought I didn't get in because I screwed up and basically they would tell me on the spot if I got a 'call back' (2nd round of audition), which I didn't.

After which, I met up with the choir 孩儿 for steamboat gathering before the camp (so called tradition). And before I could sit down and enjoy the dinner, I got a call from the audition people and they told me I was 'On Board' (which means I didn't need to go to 2nd round of auditions, I got through it already). I quickly ran back to SMU for them to take down my details and dancing shoe size and they briefed us about the contract and the salary etc. However, they will only confirm if I am in by August because I told them I can only do part time, so right now I can only wait. Wait or not, its damn cool already! And during the briefing, there are only 4 of us who got through the auditions! Seriously, I was really lucky. In fact, I didn't expect such progress and opportunities for someone like me who just got into dancing and singing 1 month ago.

Then, I when back to finish my dinner with the choir peeps and we went to '记得吃' for dessert. I am still waiting for photos from Vivien.

Happening or not?

I am wondering why is it the younger ones are more concerned about my personal life when I am not entirely concerned about it. But anyway, thanks for all your concern, I will find a girlfriend soon, when I have the time. =)

Life been giving me a lot of mixed signals recently. I find myself not bothering with things I used to, and I find myself bothering with things I don't used to.

2010-06-27T23:19:00.002+08:00

In our parents' eyes, we will always be kids.

It was raining heavily today when me and my dad left the house to the bus stop.

When I was about to board the bus despite the heavy rain, my dad stopped me and took out his umbrella to shelter me into the bus. He did the same when I alighted from the bus.

No matter how old we are, our parents love us all the same. =)

Life's been really happening nowadays. I made it through the Universal Studios audition and I am waiting for the contract in August. How wonderful it would be if I could work there as an entertainer over the weekends while I am still studying. I get paid to learn dancing and singing as well. How cool is that.

And the annual june choir camp almost burst one of my blood vessels. I got to say at the end of it, there was no sense of satisfaction to it. In short, it was also a failure on my part for this disappointment. I will have to settle this, we'll see.

2010-06-18T01:24:00.002+08:00

An old friend of mine told me why am I still there after so many years; I have seen it all already, there's nothing new to see. I guess, the only thing new is the people. Problems occuring are always the same. Approached solutions are almost similar as well. To be frank, there isn't much personal growth anymore. To some extent, it really depends on how much growth you want to set for yourself. If you don't see anymore potential for growth, then there will be hardly any.

After so many tiring days, it's finally over. I kinda miss it actually. Now it feels like something is lacking in my life.

I know I can be too fierce sometimes, but is it always necessary?

I know everything will be alright at the end, but when is the end coming.

2010-06-07T22:29:00.005+08:00

Everyone is growing up, or perhaps, moving on with their lives at such a pace I reckon is too fast. I'm not sure if its good or bad.

Or maybe I am the only one who hasn't been moving on, who has always been chained to the memories of the past, be it good or bad. I do wonder what will happened to me if I move on. I will probably live a more carefree life.

I seriously wondered what happened to me, to a person who had many dreams and ambitions, now reduced to finding an outlet for his life.

Perhaps I have been doing too much things, too much little things which are exhaustive nonethelss. They could have been expending too much of my energy.

I have been getting into lots of uneccesary troubles lately. It wouldn't happened if I have done a more better job, if I could have stay put and know what my priorities are instead of running around. It's a magnification of my life. I realise, I am doing much the same thing to myself.

Seeing hyped up individuals made me restless.

Probably I am just bored, being tied down to a lot of things. On the other hand, I wouldn't say I am someone who lacks commitment. Its a matter of what I am committing to.

Right now, I just want to sleep, simply because I am tired. And I am not sure what I am tired of.

I never felt so much like this before, to tell others to just leave me alone.

2010-05-31T12:23:00.003+08:00

Sometimes, when I am busy, it gets really busy that I wish for a breather. Sometimes, when there is nothing, there is really nothing to do that I wish for a packed schedule.

Last week, I was no superman. Singing 'Superman' by Lazlo Bane made this realisation even stronger. I was not as invulnerable as I thought. In fact, I was never Clark Kent, probably just self deluded.

But I am not giving up yet, this stark reality. Because I know I will achieve what I started out with. I may not have mutant powers to aid me in this, but I still have myself.

There will definitely be some changes, more challenges, while I risk myself out of my comfort zone. No matter how different it will be, I am still me, in some ways.

2010-05-25T01:02:00.002+08:00

Wow, its getting more and more happening that I am feeling guilty about it.

2010-05-21T10:02:00.000+08:00

阿旺对我说, "不要玩得太过火."

2010-05-18T14:10:00.002+08:00

Excellent vacation in Hong Kong! I was the biggest winner in my family because I bought the most stuff and apparently the biggest loser because I am still in debt to my brother.

I really feel blessed with things somehow working well for me. Although it will not be exactly what I wanted it to be, it least I managed to successfully keep all my vacation days occupied.

Here's a brief outline, from now to end of July, every monday to wednesday will have me working back at my secondary school and every thursday to saturday will have me doing my summer research back in NTU. And sundays? They are meant for giving tuitions. So the only times when I get the whole day off will be during the public holidays as declared by the government and nights for dinners.

On top of the very packed days, I have a list of personal development goals to complete. That shall remain a secrecy for now until I managed to accomplish them.

So looks like these 4 months of holidays are not for me to laze around and tuang, but yea, I got to utilise it to do things which are not possible to complete when my school starts.

2010-05-06T10:10:00.004+08:00

It had been a rather dramatic day for our big move-out. Our rented van broke down, then we got stuck in traffic jams and also for driving 2 anticlockwise rounds around Singapore (from west to east to north to west to east to north to home).... it was madness... basically, what could go wrong just went wrong! But of course we survived lah, how can we not? I finally understood how taking part in the Amazing Race feels. Nevertheless, I think it an appropriate closure because it sort of ended with a bang!

Last shot in the almost clean room!

A fraction of all our rubbish...

Giving our final regards to our beloved home for the past 2 semesters...

That's all for our first year in NTU...

And yes, I have been waiting every long for this moment, for my exams to end, for my first end to end and for my holidays to start!!!

Leaving on a jet plane in a few hours time to Macau then Hong Kong... will be back on the 11th May! Don't miss me. Enjoy yourselves!

2010-05-01T13:33:00.002+08:00

I just woke up! At 1230?!?! A good 8 hours of uninterrupted sleep! It was actually a malfunction of my alarm clock which for some reason did not ring as set.

Recently 2 person complained that years ago, my blog was so lagged whenever they visited due to the ultra volume of photos I posted and that how come my blog is missing the photos now? So they do miss the lag when access my blog uh! Haha

2010-04-30T23:55:00.001+08:00

I almost could not wipe the smile off my face after I handed up my physics paper. Not because the paper was do-able (in fact I wouldn't say the paper was easy at all) but because I am only left with only 1 more paper which equals to faster time to freedom!

Met up with Ching Wei, Teck Wee, Anson, Anabelle, Daniel and his wife (basically secondary school friends) for dinner to catch up on lost times. I realised that the way we behave is still as though we are stuck in our teens. The only difference is the topics brought up for discussion; ranging from breastfeeding babies to the procedures for marriage registration. Am I seriously that old?

To digest the horrendous 'Massive Attack' dessert from Breeks, we decided to take a walk to the most hip place in Singapore; the helix bridge and the Marina Bay Sands. The helix bridge was built to represent a DNA structure and they even included base-pairing symbols on the walkway! I was amazed by the casino though I didn't enter it (hello, 100 bucks?). The people behind this put in a hell lot of effort to make this whole thing in epic proportions. They really want to drain our tourists' money.

Next time I will be bringing my camera along when the Marina Bay Sands is completed.

I am still smiling now.....because my exams are ending...REAL soon!

2010-04-29T13:29:00.003+08:00

I spoke to 大家姐 today. Its been such a long time ever since I came in touch with a fellow Habitat for Humanity trip member.

But what struck me hard is when she asked me this, "Why you never do something so exciting? What happened?"

The term exciting is not refering to getting a ride on a roller coaster but rather, doing something out of our comfort zone and something that we like, something that guides us along the path of pursuing our dreams.

In fact, I was rather ashamed to reply her, "Cos I am so tied down..."

Am I that tied down? Or have I lost sight of where I was heading to?

In life, it is definitely not a smooth sailing journey. Sometimes we tend to lose our sense of direction, sometimes even ourselves. But no matter how lost we are, we have to find our way back in one way or another. Thankfully, knowing that you are lost is the first step to rectify the problem.

I know I am lost. But I will definitely find my way back.

2010-04-24T23:47:00.002+08:00

So I had the most expensive dinner at NTU canteen 5 just now.

Cheng Kok and Xuan Yong acting cool.

$5.40 for the meal. Lemon fish, coffee pork ribs, hotplate tofu and some vegetable shared among 3 of us; me, cheong kok and xuan yong.

Though its a bit expensive but the taste was not bad!

Dessert!! Ice cream and waffle at canteen 2.

Capturing memories of hall 6 living conditions before moving out! Hahaha!

Back to studying!

2010-04-20T23:03:00.002+08:00

Haha, I am such a loser.

Just before dinner, I got a phone call from someone and there was a problem with my caller ID that no number was not displayed.

[Caller]: Hello Weslie ah, do you know where I can get free parking at NTU?
[Weslie]: Hello. Yea, you can try parking at the halls' carparks. They should be free.
[Caller]: Ok, thank you.
[Weslie]: Eh, sorry ah.. who is this?
[Caller]: Zheng Yi la...

Wah lau, I can't believe that I couldn't recognise my voice of my close friend whom I have known for coming 10 years!!! I think he wanted to slap me or something la. Haha.

2010-04-19T19:26:00.003+08:00

Trying to maximise the best grades for your university score is not about memorising everything and applying them during the examinations. It is about taking a gamble on which modules you should give it up or not. Haha.

I am in fact taking a gamble on modules which I have no talent for. Sorry monster, and its physics and maths.

2010-04-16T23:24:00.001+08:00

Learn how to say no.

Enthusiasm in view of an oscillation problem

2010-04-14T15:18:00.004+08:00

You either make it or break it; there is no other way out.

Enthusiasm in life is just like an oscillation (I'm not sure why I like to link things to oscillations recently). In an ideal pendulum experiment, there will be no oscillatory damping to the motion, so the pendulum will continue to oscillate forever.

However, in a real world, there will always be damping.

The same goes for enthusiasm. Over time there will be resistance to your passion and what so ever. If you do not find ways to minimise the resistance, your enthusiasm will diminish in due time. To prevent this from happening, we will have to find out what is the resonating frequency of our enthusiasm and supply a constant periodic force in sync with it. Then only can your enthusiasm be fuelled to give you strength to finish what you have started.

We always have the kind of enthusiastic feeling when we are starting on something new. Unless we do something to keep that feeling up, or we will find ourselves dreading through the whole process.

2010-04-11T19:03:00.003+08:00

Watched Clash of the Titans with Ding Wei yesterday. I must say the effects are amazing but the plot was rather nonsense. The producers followed the myth of perseus quite loosely. However, having said so, watching this movie and the late Percy Jackson's, and playing Age of Mythology months ago, sort of rekindle my fascination for the greek mythology. Mythology is fascinating, except for the incest making out portion.

Medusa by Arnold Bocklin

Medusa is an ionic character, with lots of snakes on her head. She's deplicted as an evil creature with powers to turn people who look at her into stone. But what if Medusa was a gravely misunderstood character? Someone like us who just wish to gain acceptance by the rest?

2010-04-08T02:08:00.002+08:00

Where is the transparency!!!!!

2010-04-05T16:41:00.002+08:00

Yay, I am finally doing my main reaction today after what is seems like 3 months of preparation for the starting materials. And.. I got only 2 weeks more to complete my research?!?!?!

Second thing for this post: seriously, birds of the same feather flock together...

Third thing for this post: Had an eventful weekend without much studying which results in death for my physics term test just now. I have already dealed with the fact that physics and mathematics is not my cup of tea. Modules I have taken this semester are mostly boring, with so many emphasis on calculations stuff. Where's the biology part?!?!

Fourth thing for this post: I feel very blessed to have the kind of life I have now. I seriously won't ask for anything better. But that doesn't mean I don't get irritated with certain things. Haha

Fifth thing for this post: Ironically when comes to my studies, I really can't wait to hit the restart button next semester because I realised I am in such a mess this time round.

Sixth thing for this post: Exams....

Seventh thing for this post: Then a 4-month long vacation!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-03-27T23:44:00.002+08:00

A close friend of mine recently gave me an offline message on MSN.

"I dedicate this paragraph to you.

A key foundation for improving self concept is to accept yourself as someone in process. The human self is continuously in process, always changing, always becoming. This implies several things.

First, it means that it's healthy to accept who you are right now as a starting point. You don't have to like or admire everything about yourself, but accepting who you are today allows you to move forward.

The person you are today has been shaped by all experiences, interactions, reflected appraisals and social comparsions during your life.

You cannot change the past, but you do not have to be bound by it forever. Only by realising and accepting who you are now can you grow in new ways.

Don't let yourself by hindered by negative self fulfilling prophecies or by the belief that you cannot change. =) "

Thanks Cheng Kok.

2010-03-27T02:01:00.001+08:00

Eleka nahmen nahmen ahtum ahtum eleka nahmen...

No good deed goes unpunished...

2010-03-24T00:02:00.002+08:00

What do you do when you feel very frustrated?

I can do a lot of things to vent out my frustration but sadly, there isn't any time for me to vent out anything at all.

I am frustrated at the fact that despite my the mountain of stuff I am dealing with now, I am expected to perfom everything dutifully and if best, perfectly.

Only you yourself can understand how busy you are. No pointing in explaining that to others because it will be deem as excuses. Besides who doesn't have the right to say, "Hey, I am busy too...."

Frustrating isn't it. I can't seem to put through exactly what I am feeling now either. As what my roomie told me, "There's nothing you can really do about this." Which I have to agree with absolutely.

2010-03-21T16:30:00.003+08:00

Ok, I know I should be studying but hey I need a meal break as well right?

So while eating my cupnoodles, I decided to watch youtube videos at the same time, as my usual routine; to entertain myself while eating la.

Then I came across this video of this extremely popular group who was perfoming live, and it was of course my one of my favourite songs. It was horrible. I would prefer the MTV or the recorded version. The group is not able to perform LIVE well enough, with the lack of energy and singing off tune for some parts; I was disappointed.

I am sure fans of their vocal quality will be disappointed after watching the LIVE videos as well, except for fans who are head over heels with their appearance or dance steps.

I think its important for a singer to sing well in front of a live audience. There is no point in having a perfect recording, for all we know, the audio recording could have been edited countless times to produce that kind of quality.

At least the only consolation I get is that, the group is not lip sync-ing. Who will lip sync to an off tune vocal track anyway?

2010-03-20T16:54:00.004+08:00

Wow, I only have 1 month more to my finals and then its 4 months of holiday with a trip to Hong Kong and Macau. But saying that its a 4 month break would be a lie because I still have to go back to school to complete my summer research programme in organic compounds synthesis.

I can't wait for march to end. That will put an end to my hectic schedule which I will then be able to settle down and mug.

Yes, mug. I am going to be a mugger. A mugger that I never was. A mugger as scary that it will force my competitors to mug for their lives. So you all better be scared, because I am going to mug extremely hard to make up for my lost for the past few months.

Ok, with that, I shall start my studying regime over the weekend in my hostel.

Anyway my camera is damaged, so there won't be photos anytime soon. Wait, actually I realised that it doesn't make a difference because there hasn't been any photos for a long time already.

Okok, when my break is here, I can resume my phototaking life. Haha

By the way, you are more than welcome to deliver food to me over this weekend and next weekend. I will be more than happy to receive it with open arms and I give you the best treatment I can offer you with whatever I have in my hostel. =)

2010-03-08T18:20:00.005+08:00

I must share my quirky experience at this restaurant which took place last sunday night at a shopping centre in Bugis with lots of lights surrounding the external walls of the building.

The menu was very attractive, and not everyday you can get to see a fusion of western and eastern food as obvious as this; la-mian carbonara. Of course, since it was carbonara, I was tempted to try.

And then came a series of events...

1. When we got seated, one of the waitress practically threw the menus on the table with 'thuds' so loud I never heard from a restaurant before. She even placed the utensils and plates with 'clings and clanks'.

2. Another waitress came and took our order. We asked her some questions regarding the set meal specials. She answered with a voice so soft that my parents asked me and my brother after she left, "How did you manage to understand what she just said?" I replied, "I didn't understand either... so I jumped straight into placing my orders..."

3. Just before my pasta arrived, the third waitress came over and told us that the fried chicken cultet is not available. My mum got quite irritated and asked why is it that so many items are not available. She replied that this is the restaurant's last day...

We had a rather awkward and silent dinner; half irritated with the service and half laughing at my luck in choosing a restaurant on its last day.

I didn't really notice how service can make a difference to the taste of the food you are going to eat. Even if the food is good, with bad service, it will taste horrible, because your mood is already badly affected by the staff attitude. If the service is excellent but the food is horrible, you realise that you won't be complaining that much about it.

I am poisoned by dichloromethane even though it is one of the least toxic simple hydrocarbons. It is already the second day and yet I still can smell that chemical from my hands. Argh..

2010-03-08T01:25:00.001+08:00

What?! My recess week is over?!?

2010-03-06T22:28:00.003+08:00

I have been thinking quite hard with regards to what emo ah wang had told me during the concert last night. I realised that ever since I started teaching my friends, I began to lose them as friends. So does this means that I got to stop teaching my friends? It's quite complicated thinking about it and it kind of caught me right a middle of a dilemma. Should I be selfish and stop teaching so that I will stop losing friends? Yet at the same time, I am a strong advocate of education, that we should with whatever means we have, help each other learn. So in the process of up keeping what I believe in, I am left to accept that I will lose them?

Even with all the hassle of university life, I still have to face 2 persons in my life who are not in anyway, making it any easier for me; like I am not busy enough already. I am not sure either if I should be thankful that both of them are giving me similar problems; at least I don't have to confront contrasting emotions at the same time. I will probably turn schizophrenic having to deal with anger and then sadness at the next instant. Right now, both of them are behaving in manners which are incomprehensible. In plain Singlish, it means "Totally cannot understand".

Well, things are beginning to get real hectic in school. Probably means less time to think about all these nonsense. I mean why can't everybody just live in harmony and peace? But no, I am always having to deal with such people in all phases of my life.

Momentum

2010-03-04T16:54:00.002+08:00

I was chatting to this ENT on MSN, and here is an excerpt of our conversation,

[Shao Soon]: u in hall ma, cannot study meh?
[Weslie]: cannot lo, too many stuff to do and today i finally settled down but i realised no more momentum already
[Shao Soon]: then you need to gain more mass

Thanks ah

2010-03-03T00:44:00.002+08:00

I had a warning from a friend just now, that if I were to continue in this state, I would probably breakdown soon.

And if you were to ask me, I seriously never felt this busy before.

2010-03-02T13:14:00.004+08:00

I may have some hyperactivity disorder in me. I can't sit still for long hours. I can't focus on numbers and huge amount of words.

Or maybe I am just largely distracted.

I woke up today, from having a bad dream again. Thinking back, it was rather exciting but honestly, I would never want to get caught in a similar situation again.

I was standing beside a car, at a driveway, somewhere in an area with high rise buildings. It was nightfall and the only sources of light came from the head lamps from vehicles and street lamps. I didn't ask why there were no lights coming from the buildings. I wasn't sure why I was there either.

There was someone beside me, someone familiar but I can't recall who it was. He could be a friend of mine. We were having a conversation. It seemed pretty hushed, like it was forbidden for anyone to speak. Then came a moan.

It grew louder till it became hard for us to ignore. It was a man. He was moaning and edging awkwardly towards us from a distance. It was strange. I have never seen a man move like this before. I stared as the man grew closer to us. As much as my instinct tells me to get out of here, my legs would not move. I knew I was in a dream. I told myself to wake up but I still remained there.

The man came real close to us. Under the orange glow of the street lamp, he looked horrible. He was breathing heavily and was making weird grunting noises. Before I could turn my head away from him, he leaped at me and slam me at the nearby car. He widened his jaws as much as he could as he aimed for my neck. He was trying to bite my neck off! I tried to push him away but his weight was all over me. My friend simply looked. He didn't bother to do anything to get that man away from me.

I pushed that creep away from me again and this time it worked. I tried to punch him but it was useless. I felt no strength in my arms. I was punching air. In short, I was helpless. Then in a split of a second, the man lunged towards my friend and bit his neck, puncturing his carotid artery. Copious amount of fresh blood spilled out and yet my friend did not bother to budge. He just stood there to be a willing victim to that man.

I ran. I tried to run away from that scene. What on Earth was going on? Why was the man after us? Why did my friend allowed himself to be attacked?

Then out of nowhere, more appeared behind me. Instead of moving slowly previously like that man, they sprinted at me. They were all after me. They were all out to eat me alive. I ran as fast as I could but it was difficult. That's the problem with being in a dream, you don't have much control over your movements. For me, it was like running through a viscous layer of air with weights attached to my legs.

I really hate this feeling.

Somehow, I still managed to get into a building with hordes of who-knows-what right at my heels. And the dream did not stop there. It has just begun but I shall end my narrative here.

I think its dreadful to have such dreams which depicts you having to escape from an army of man-eating zombies. I don't blame it on playing too much Left-4-dead, after all its been quite some time ever since I squeeze the trigger on an infected being. However, I think that this could be a possibility of some sort of a manifestation of my life.

Although I do enjoyed playing L4D, it doesn't becomes funny when it is really happening to you.

But what if one day, the same situation really happens?

2010-02-26T23:00:00.004+08:00

I feel like throwing away my phone!! It's so hard to sms that I don't even feel like replying or smsing anyone la!

Just call me if there is anything. Otherwise deal with my short sms replies. Haha

Anyway I met up with Zheng Yi for lunch in NUS today and I met a lot of people during my trip there; namely Jeremy, Keru, You Cheng and Wayne at all sorts of different places. Seriously, its such a small world...

But the most orbiang moment was with that pig!

[Zheng Yi]: Hey you know I always happen to see Keru in the canteen?
[Me]: Really? Oh... I should give her a call now.

[Me]: Hello where are you ah?
[Keru]: In school la...
[Me]: In school where???
[Keru]: Canteen...
[Me]: Canteen? I am also at the canteen leh! Near the cafe there!
[Keru]: Huh where are you? I am also near there leh! The pink chairs one right?
[Me]: Yah yah, its full of pink chairs!

I was scanning the whole place, trying to look for that pig, and I seriously cannot see her. Until Zheng Yi stood up and Keru was right behind her. She was just sitting at the table behind us and Zheng Yi was blocking our line of sight. Only when Zheng Yi stood up then we just happen to see each other and it was horrible, because she came over and terrorise my lunch! I am not going to call her next time anymore! Hahahahahahahahaha

2010-02-25T01:50:00.002+08:00

I am too busy that I can't find the time to do anything. Even when its time for me to study, I can't, because I will use that time instead to sleep or concuss. I can't even find time to do the things I like to relax and even if I can, I probably won't be enjoying because the thought of me slacking and not studying is tormenting.

Everything is in a mess. A real big mess. There's too many nonsense things in my head already.

I have to find some way to un-busy myself altogether.

2010-02-17T00:45:00.004+08:00

I am very lazy to upload photos la. Haha

Anyway, something scary happened to me last night... is a real story ok...

Imagine... you cabbed at 1am back to your HDB estate.

It was windy and cold. There wasn't a single person anywhere and it very very quiet.

You thanked the taxi uncle, kept your change, left the taxi and proceeded to take the lift.

You didn't have to wait long before the lift arrived. You walked in promptly and pressed the 11th floor button. While waiting for the lift to reach your level, you took out your house keys from your green timbuk2 sling bag and held it in your hands.

The door opened. You saw lights in the living room and were surprised that your family are not asleep yet.

However, something was strange. Your house gate is black but it is suppose to be grey. Your neighbour's house gate is also black which is suppose to be grey as well. You got shocked for a moment. This is not your house! You wondered how you could have made such a mistake. How could you end up outside a wrong house after staying there for the past 10 years?

You told yourself not to panic although this sick joke is happening in the middle of the night. You calmed yourself down and told yourself that you could be in the wrong level. You got back into the lift and pressed the 11th floor button. The button did not light up, the lift door did not close, nothing happened. You looked up and saw...

(Highlight below to see what happens next! Exciting right!)

...that you are still on the 11th floor.

Then you just walked out of the lift, climbed down a flight of stairs to the common coridoor, having realised that you have took the wrong lift. Hahahahahahahahahaha.

2010-02-12T21:51:00.002+08:00

Thank you Zheng Yi for crashing over my place yesterday. Really appreciate the company for the night! And sorry for abandoning you at Old Canteen A haha.

I don't mean that I am tired of my roommate ok haha, its just that sometimes we need to reconnect with people who we deem close to us, right?

Went back to PRSS today again for Choir main comm meeting. Met a lot of recently graduated students; they seemed to be doing well which is good to know.

Whatever it is, please take care of yourself. I know you will be strong. Just hang in there and give yourself time =)

2010-02-10T14:47:00.002+08:00

I cannot keep losing my green things. Within a month, I have lost my waterbottle and handphone pouch. And today I almost lost another handphone pouch if not for Heng Wei, who recognised my green thing on the floor. Thanks man! So its good to own items which shouts out your identity. If my handphone was ordinary, I would have lost 2 pouches in a month!

2010-02-09T00:23:00.000+08:00

Haha. I guess I am not the only one who misread LerkThai as JerkThai. The 'L' and 'J' in the restaurant logo can be difficult to differentiate haha.

2010-02-07T00:56:00.002+08:00

I met this inspirational lower secondary boy working at SuperDog yesterday during dinner. He came to tell me how much he really want to do well in school.

We wanted to keep in contact so he gave me his email, telling me to add him on facebook. I think he made a mistake in the email that he gave me, because that email can not be found on facebook.

I went back to SuperDog today, hoping that he will be working in the morning shift but he wasn't there. The manager was not sure who worked last night either. Yu went back to SuperDog at night and he too, told me he could not find that boy.

I am going to try my luck at SuperDog the next weekend to see if I can still find that boy.

It's very interesting how fate works.

Fate can bring people together and pull people apart at the very next instant. And we don't really have much control over this...

2010-02-05T23:55:00.001+08:00

Somehow I feel that I am still part of PRSS. Mmm, or perhaps, PRSS is already a part of me, so much so that feel misplaced, that I shouldn't be studying in uni now, that I just want to go back to PRSS. This I know is not possible except during my summer holidays which I know I will be going back. Been asking myself what draws me back to the school after all these years. I can't really think of a concrete reason. It's a possible combination of many strong reasons; good memories of my sec school days, teachers (luckily they are still around), many years of juniors, choir, and for the very fact that PRSS made my growing up years complete. I seriously could not have asked for anything better because to me, it is the best already.

Went back to PRSS choir today. I really hope that things will get better for them. I don't want it to be a situation of 'falling from grace' as quoted from a senior. Jia you!

Had a Real Guys outing to celebrate De Hong and Firdaus belated birthdays. It's really good to see this group of guys sticking out for one another, afterall, we did grow up together, going through good and essentially ridiculous times. What can you expect from a small group of guys trying to fit into a highly populated female choir? To me, I have watched them through their sec school days, to poly, JCs and even one in army now and it made me realised that I am indeed very old already haha!!!

Anyway we went to pomo to eat lots of fried chicken and other unhealthy stuff at Dallas Chicken and Ribs. Not bad, very nice, eat until full and its worth the money. Then we went to play LAN hahaha. I think the Real Guys is turning into a LAN gang already haha. And after which I went back to my hostel.

It was definitely great to catch up with these guys every once in a while =)

It's not easy for someone to ask for help. It's even more difficult to ask for help in sincere way. Don't turn them away if you can, because that someone really needs the help or else he would not have asked you for it.

2010-02-04T02:11:00.000+08:00

Celebrated Wileen's belated 22nd (old auntie liao) birthday at some atas place in Raffles City Shopping Centre followed by night activity at the Pump Station! Woo Hoo, delayed photos haha

2010-02-03T15:14:00.001+08:00

I am attending a defence science lecture on ionosphere. It's interesting but very dry when come to calculations and graphs. And people are leaving the lecture theatre at an alarming rate haha

2010-01-29T02:16:00.000+08:00

The taxi uncle and I were so engrossed in our conversations that he sped 100km/h in the KPE tunnel unknowingly. If he was caught by the camera, he could be taken to court and face up to a fine of about $500.

I felt so guilty that he exceeded the speed limit. I should have noticed that he was driving exceptionally fast in the tunnel.

I could tell that he was very worried because he kept mentioning whether he was caught by the camera or not.

And it became rather awkward so we stop talking.

And I wondered in the taxi; when you realised someone could be in trouble and you are in no position to help, do you stop talking and let him think through what happened or do you keep talking to him to distract him because you are afraid that he will go into an emotional down spiral if you leave him alone?

2010-01-28T11:54:00.003+08:00

I am getting back my momentum in my uni life especially my studies. At least I started to do my homework as of yesterday. Physics and Mathematics this semester is even more horrible than that of last year. I would never in a million years volunteer myself to take such modules if not for my scholarship programme requirement. Then again I just need to get through these modules for one more year and I am done with it to just focus on Chemistry and other probably interesting stuff. And I know there is a probably a reason why I am taking such modules.

However, I am still not able to cure myself of the sleeping disease. I am still not able to force myself to wake up and be at lessons on time. And I am still not able to keep myself awake during lectures and yes, even tutorial when the tutor is just explaining things to a group size of 20 people. I just can't stay awake. I really need to find a solution to this sleeping problem, because right now as a result of this sleepiness, I am seriously lagging behind by 3 weeks. Maybe the sleeping disease is a sign of saying that I am tired of school already. Probably true. Because even when I am half-awake knowing that I am late for my class, or appointment, I will still continue to go back to sleep, ignoring what consequences it will bring me.

On a lighter note, can you believe that I spent $52 on buying random stuff in school? There is sort of a carnival so I bought tees and even a softtoy.... hahahahaha... Such events really make uni life more exciting and of course a bigger hole in our pockets.

Today is the first day for the new JC 1 students. I hope all of my juniors will have lots of fun today and over the next few days, especially orientation (although I treat orientations as the bane of my life) as soon they will realise that secondary school is probably the most enjoyable honeymoon period, because life will become more and more challenging from now on. But no matter how tough things can get, we just have to think positive and continue on with our lives. No matter how tough chemistry can get, just refer to your notes, don't come looking for me. Hahaha... kidding la.

I'm going to meet monster chan for lunch. He said he will try to catch that yoshi bear from the claw machine. Yes, surprised to me as well, there is a new toy catcher machine in my school as well, but only for this semester.

If one didn't put in the effort, it would be easier to let go.

2010-01-24T23:21:00.001+08:00

I finished a book today; Wicked, The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West. It was a green coloured book. Haha, anyway that's not the point. The book gives an alternate version of the Wicked Witch of the West from our well known wizard of oz story where she was killed by Dorothy. And in this book, she was still killed by a bucket of water. The main theme in the book question the concept of evil. What is evil anyway?

I love the main character, Elphaba a lot. I told my roomie that I am going to talk like her already. Haha.

Go read the book.

Now I can't wait to watch the musical. The story a bit different though. But it won't be showed Singapore for now. I checked out the songs. They were great. It was actually defying gravity sung by the Glee cast which introduced me to this musical, which I then realised the existence of the book, which I then borrowed from my roomie. Haha.

Here is one small part I really like...

People who claim that they're evil are usually no worse than the rest of us. It's people who claim that they're good, or anyway better than the rest of us, that you have to be wary of.

2010-01-23T00:39:00.001+08:00

Apologies to Chun Long for not including your name in my 21st birthday thanks. haha, sorry la, its there already, go find ok! Haha!

It really feels good to be at home.

Went back to PRSS to conduct chemistry remedial class. Next week going back again. Yay. Then went shopping with my maid aka Chun Long whom I asked to carry my heavy stuff. Haha

Had tuition with yc and supper with yu. I learnt that smashed sandcastles cannot be rebuilt overnight. You need to give time, to let things settle down, then to plan, then to carry out the action to rebuilt the castle again. This time, who knows, it could be a palace.

And I am going to take an early train tomorrow with monster chan to ride back to NTU.

Busy busy huh. It's gonna get worse.

Misunderstanding kills. Especially among close friends. But I am glad that we talked to each other about it. Of course lah, we have been there for each other so many times le. Haha.

2010-01-21T01:29:00.004+08:00

I must have been in a pretty foul mood today..... actually, I was in a real foul mood.

I am still not able to find the root cause of the foul mood amongst all the irritating things in my head. Really sorry to those who tried to cheer me up, but got affected badly by my non-chalant attitude.

Two more things to add on...

1. There are people you will meet in your life, who uses you and then forgets about you after they are done.

2. I saw this from an email, it is really heart warming to see such emails circulating around in this era. I thought forwarded emails are already a thing of a past. Anyway at the end of the email held this sentence, "Friendship isn't about who you have known the longest, but about those who came and never left your side." I agree with the first half of the sentence. But in the second half, I am skeptical about friends never leaving your side.

My roomie is coughing non stop in his sleep. Please get well soon!

Everyone please take care of your health!

2010-01-18T23:36:00.001+08:00

I am largely distracted. I am still in holiday mood. I just don't feel like studying...

2010-01-17T12:41:00.003+08:00

Instead of wasting time thinking about problems, why not just enjoy each other's company?

2010-01-13T23:25:00.001+08:00

I seriously don't understand why you are doing this to yourself.

My 21st Birthday Thanks

2010-01-10T15:03:00.018+08:00

This is a special post dedicated to all who made my 21st birthday extremely memorable. I have tried in everyway to record down everyone’s name. Apologies if I missed out your names. Please let me know if I missed out your names.

Thank you Mum and Dad for bringing me up all these years, for being the pillars of my life and to my brother who was always there for me, and for me to abuse! Haha. Thank you so much for giving me such a wonderful family, and a home where I really want to be.

Thank you to all the teachers in my life, who have taught me and guided me throughout my growing years.

And definitely to all my friends I made throughout the years. Thank you very much for being there for me all these years.

First, let’s start with wishes. Thank you very much for remembering my birthday!!!

Via phone calls:
Avin leong, Kwan Chun Long, Lee De Hong, Tan Huiyi (all the way from Korea!)

Via SMS:
Anwar, Benedict Yeo, Benita, Bernice Loh, Cassandra Cheah, Ching Wei, Choon Yee, Derrick Soh, Eberta Jie, Fabiola, Farhana, Goh Zhi Yi, Heup Seng, Hou Teck, Isabelle, Jana, Jeremy Heng, Jun Xiang, Justin Kho, Kenneth Teo, Keru, Min Min, Ms Caroline Kong, Qiao Feng, Shao Soon, Sharon Salim, Siok Wen, Song Choon, Thomas Oh, Wileen, Xiao Xuan, Xing Yi, Yee May, Zack Koh, Zheng Yi

Via Facebook:
Alexander Mulia, Alvin Lakmudin, Anson Ho, Auntie Amy, Beatrix Lee, Benson Choo, Bernard Chua, Chan Ho Lun, Cheong Xuan Yong, Cheryl Chong, Cheryl Tan, Clarissa Koh, Clemence Chang, Danielle Tan, Dany Yang, Darius Loh, David Tng, Dewi Lim, Don Teo, Elson Lee, Eric Jr, Errol Limenta, Fonia Tan, Gan Xiao Xuan, Goh Juin Hong, Heng Yongping, Ho Guonian, Jana lim, Jayson, Jeremy Ong, Joleen Tan, Jonathan Poh, June Kua, Justin Lim, Keh Hong Wei, Kenneth Lim (BIMBO), Koh Jiunn Kai, Kong Tao Yat, Kwan Wei Xiang, Lee Choon Yee, Lee De Hong, Leong Kok hou, Lim Dingyang, Lim Shi Min, Lim Teck Wee, Lim Wei Jie, Lim Zhang Quan, Lin Jing Hong, Low Zhi Jun, Luqman Nur Hakim, MaryJane, Master Yuen, Melody Tan, Mohammad Zaidi, Mohd Faizal, Muhammed Umer,Nazurah Nasha, Ng Kian Tat, Nuratiqah Nasir, Oh Cheng Kok, Ong Xuan Wei, Paul Cheng, Peter Luen, Priyanka Raina, Rachel Ruixian, Radhika Vyas, Rao Wei Quan, Rena Heng, Roxanne Javier, Russell Tan, Sai Aparajitha, Sangeetha, Sherly Ng, Soon Chee Yong, Tan Nian Hua, Tan Xin Ci, Tan YH, Tee Chin Yun, Tng Li Hui, Toh Song Choon, Vincent Bai, Wei Ting, Yosua Ng, Yvonne Lee

Via writing in my organizer:
Yeong Chan

Via birthday cards:
Lynette Pay

Secondly, thank you all of you who had in one way or another, celebrated my birthday with me!!!

Celebration on actual day, 23 Dec 09:

Birthday Movie, 2012: Song Choon and Tao Yat

PRSS Choir Surprise Birthday Cake: Aliah, Azreena, Helissa, Janine, Jie Min, Rou Ming, Vivien

Paintball match: Bernice, Cheng Kok, Heup Seng, Hui Juan, Keru, Tao Yat, Thomas, Wileen, Xuan Yong, Zheng Yi

Birthday dinner at Cha Cha Cha: Bernice, Cheng Kok, Hui Juan, Keru, Tao Yat, Thomas, Wileen, Zheng Yi

Belated birthday celebrations:

24 Dec 09: Lunch with Heup Seng and Yi Cheng

26 Dec 09: Dinner with Avin

28 Dec 09: Movie and Dinner with Justin

29 Dec 09: Dinner and LAN with Amos, Benedict, Benjamin, Benson, De Hong, Firdaus, Melissa, Qiao Feng, Yan Jie

Thirdly but certainly not the least, thank you all who have given me presents for my birthday, a gift which I can keep for many years to come which will remind me of my coming of age!!!

My parents and brother for giving money to spend on my Taiwan trip!

All my aunts for giving me big fat angbaos!

Chemistry Freak test tube:
Firdaus and Yan Jie

China panda, magic whistle and a pair of mandarin couple:
Benjamin

Birthday Puzzle:
Hei Wai

Braun Buffel wallet:
Heiwai, Huiyi, Houteck, Keru, Tao Yat, Shao Soon, Song Choon, Ting Hui, Wileen

Esprit Black Tee:
Benedict

Freshbox apparels: Cheng Kok, Xuan Yong

Gio Green Tee:
Thomas and Hui Juan

Green Yoshi
Avin, Clement, Vincent Ngik

Highlander power, Eau De Toilette:
Benson

New Balance Green Shoes:
Avin, Heup Seng, Jie Long, Kah Kiat, Kian Siong, Wen Jie, Yi Cheng

Red F1 Watch
Aunt Pauline, Uncle Clifford and Cousin Kenneth

Weekends at Bellevue Book:
Bernice and Zheng Yi

Really really thank you everyone for making my birthday the best I could have ever asked for!!

2010-01-09T23:15:00.002+08:00

...finally going to have an early night tonight in weeks without making myself tired on purpose to fall asleep...

...although I am still quite perturbed about the way things are after all these that had happened...

...no doubt that I am rather moody and short fused these days...

...probably everything will seems ok when I wake up tomorrow...

...because we know things will eventually get better...

2010-01-08T23:54:00.004+08:00

Been busy with PRSS Choir this week. But who cares? I enjoy it!

Major events this week included...

FINISHED PACKING! OMG TO THE MAX! Yea, finally finished the horrible massive things all over my house. I probably won't be doing any such majoring clearing of stuff for a very long time, although there's lots of papers I still need to organise properly. Haha. I still got phobia of buying those small small stuff though. haha. That's good. Hopefully this phobia will last in me forever! hahaha

Olympiang5 slumber party 2010 at my place on Wednesday night! 2 so called international members came back, like finally lah, although one of them, the auntie is going back to Korea land in Feb. And I got a new cousin called Victor. OMG, it took me quite some time to get used to his new plastic surgeried face! Wah lau, cannot take it. I know I am very bad becaused I told him to wear a mask to cover the lower part of his face. But seriously now Shao Soon really looks younger! Haha, congrats on your new look! I bet your wife, Keru is even more happier! haha! Woo Hoo, its been one year since the last slumber. Lots of food, pictionary and gifts exchange! And we still did not manage to finish the desserts la.

Science Centre Body Worlds Exhibition trip with the 4e7 guys on Thursday! Thanks Junxiang for choosing this day because you said that I am starting school next week so I am the deciding factor for the date of this outing. Haha!Thanks! The exhibition was very awesome! It's been so long since I went back to the science centre. My childhood place. And I always wanted to attend another one of those Body Worlds exhibition ever the one in EXPO many years ago. It's so fascinating to see the exhibits! It's really amazing how they do it! Brings anatomy to a whole new level! And of course, the young people were great company. I feel just like one of them haha. I'm 16 mah. hahaha. To digress a little, I bluff the this year sec 1s that I am 16 years old and they believed it! hahaha...

PRSS CCA Bazaar on Friday. Time for us to recruit new members for the choir. Lots of alumni members came back today. It was definitely a great time for all of us to catch up! The choir did a great job in promoting choir, being all 'high' and 'enthu'. I must say it is a loud and noisy event because there were lots of shouting here and there. haha. That's good ah. That should be the way. haha. Performed on the guitar with Ryan and the sec4 girls singing. Ryan was damn good on the guitar. Got lots to learn from him. haha.

Alumni dinner on Friday. So many of us eating, very hard to find seats leh! haha. Changed from KFC to Century Square food junction in the end. Benedict's stories were very entertaining. haha. The Real Guys + Maggie went to play Left 4 Dead 2! haha. Fun leh! But not easy to be on the infected side!

Gatherings going to be decreasing for the next few months, sian uh! Time for school on monday! Aiyo... I don't want to start school leh!

Disappearing act

2010-01-05T20:23:00.004+08:00

I really enjoyed this holiday a lot. Many reasons actually.

Gonna get really busy these days before school starts. Not sure if I am doing it on purpose. Am I doing it to just make full use of my holiday because I know all hell will break loose after 11Jan, or am I doing it just to keep myself busy as a form of distraction?

Here's a story. Could be real or just made up. Just think about whether you experienced such a thing before.

Imagine you got a close friend, who talks to you, who goes out with you, and most importantly, was there when you needed him. One day he said, hoping you would understand, he disappeared from your life. He wasn't there anymore.

You tried all means to contact him but all efforts came to nought. He disappeared. He wasn't there anymore.

Just when you probably needed him the most, he was no where to be found. He disappeared. He wasn't there anymore.

There was no word. There was nothing. His actions were definitely hurtful enough.

Someone told you, "If he wanted to talk to you, he would have done so long ago."

That someone was probably true. Or perhaps your close friend had his reasons for his disappearing act.

You are not sure who is right. But over time, you realised that that someone was probably right. Even in your own shoes, you would have done something if you want to keep in touch with whatever friend you got.

But this was no ordinary friend. But a friend whom you thought was very sincere in being your friend.

Like it or not. This disappearing act affected you. No matter how difficult it was, you were trying to come to terms with it.

Life sometimes can be unpredictable and sometimes dramatic as well.

But what happens when he suddenly shows up after all these? One day you received a sms starting with, "Hey it's been a long time..." What does it mean?

And what does it mean when the content of the sms has to do with official business, where he needed something from you.

Sure he has his own story to tell. But how were you suppose to know if you knew nothing at all.

What would you do?

Out with the old, in with the new

2010-01-04T09:04:00.003+08:00

OMG!! Yesterday I was clearing tons and tons of shoe boxes. I thought they were all empty so I threw them away downstairs. But this morning when I tried to find my new pair of green shoes, it was gone! I went downstairs to check and all the shoe boxes were gone. There goes my very high class green shoes which I got for my 21st birthday!!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Today is my third day clearing up my stuff. All my stuff that can be found all over my rooms. And now they are invading my living room!!

Its really about time I do some clearing. My mum said that I have the highest inheritance in my whole family because I really do have a lot of things. The greatest accomplishment I had was to throw away my JC notes, actually not notes, its all the worksheets. I am still keeping the notes.

Clearing and packing is seriously a no joke. I can clear and pack to the point where I feel like puking. Seriously puking. And its a lot of sweating too, shifting, carrying, bending, vacuuming, and throwing. Then again, this is probably the only time I did some something like that. I probably won't be doing this for the next few years. hahaha

I sort of envy my brother, who has only a small space in the cupboard to clear. That's about 1/20 of the things I have. And while I am doing all the clearing, he is watching One Piece movie on his laptop.

Spring cleaning is an event which I believe can bond family together. Especially when we clear stuff together (on the 1st day), we throw stuff together, etc etc. And seeing the way we talk to each other, it seems like we never change at all. However all these bonding time ceases when I have to do the clearing alone (yesterday and today). haha.

Oh well, this year's resolution, I am not going to buy anymore stuff. I really getting terrified of packing my stuff already.

Ok la, its just a joke. I still got my green shoes. How is it possible for me to make such a mistake anyway? I just thought that if it really happens, then I am really a JOKE. Haha...

But the spring cleaning thing is real =)

Happy New Year 2010

2010-01-01T15:31:00.006+08:00

Here's how I ended my 2009.

Went to PRSS in the morning to accompany HKboy to watch 'My Sister's Keeper', although we didn't manage to finish the movie because his portable DVD player went dead. It was a damn good movie. It's a touching movie so if you don't like tear jerkers movie, stay away from it.

Then went to visit PRSS choir. Well they seemed pretty geared up for orientation and CCA bazaar next week. That's good! We got to rope in more members for this new year!

HKboy is very orbiang. I decided to stop calling him HKguy because I think boy suits him better. He doesn't know how to take the MRT. He doesn't know whether we were at the green or at the red line. And he got quite kan chiong for a moment because he thought he was lost!!!!!!!!! hahahahaha, take more MRT rides la! I know you are the king of Punggol. Just Punggol only, ok?

Met with Heupseng to buy my green shoes at Leftfoot! Woo hoo!!! Hahaha. Yay finally another pair of green shoes. Thanks guys! And we watched CHAW. Korean horror movie about a monster pig. Just imagine that you can be screaming about the monster pig then right at the next moment, laughing madly at their humour. Great movie if you want to add lots of sparks to your life.

And congrats to Heupseng for getting his 'Orh jiao' (black bird) soft toy! Haha. I realise more and more Yoshi bears are appearing in the market. Haha. Cannot! How can my Yoshi bear be a common item!!!

Was watching Hai Pai Tian Xin into the New Year. Mushroom head reminds me ridiculously of Xuan Yong.

That's how I spent my new year's eve. Not bad huh! =)

No countdown for me. Hate the crowd.

School is starting soon. Going to play like mad for 1 more week. If not when school reopens, its gonna be madness again. This holiday, I really slacked a lot! hahaha. Many of you know how crazy I went during my university first semester, fortunately my results were better than expected. Then again, I am not going to take it for granted. I need to be more consistent with my studies. Ok enough about studies. Because over the next few months, there could be more post regarding school, although it is boring stuff!!!

Let's enjoy ourselves while we can for now.

Happy New Year everyone!

2009-12-30T21:26:00.002+08:00

The more I detest them, the more I find myself behaving no differently from them.

2009-12-29T01:01:00.002+08:00

Had quite a happening past few days, celebrating my birthday of course although my birthday was last week! As I told someone this, my benefits of being a birthday boy will last for a total period of 1 month till next year Jan! Haha. I shall upload all the photos on the day when I finally accept that my benefits of being a birthday boy is over. =)

Amidst all these birthday and festive celebrations, I am upset with someone now. Let's not talk about the events that led me feeling this way but let's talk about what happens when I am upset.

I realise no matter how many more times he apologizes, it will not suddenly make me smile and hahaha to him like I used to, even though I understand how much he is sorry about it.

It's not about me being not forgiving. If I did not forgive him, I would have left him alone to finish his supper, although the whole time I was in no mood for a conversation. But me being there shows something. I could have left to get to my last bus.

So the first question here goes, why do we still don't feel like talking to that person who caused all the episode even though we may have forgiven them?

Do we need time to get over it, to heal ourselves? How much time do we need then?

And the second question is, why am I that upset? Or why will we get upset with people?

Is it because we expect them to behave in a certain way but that carried themselves in a different way?

Or perhaps, in a more general notion,

Is it because we held them close to our hearts and they did something that make it seem like they are breaking away from us?

21st Birthday

2009-12-24T00:39:00.002+08:00

I had such an awesome birthday today.

It was really beyond my any words I can think of! I don't know what I am saying here.

I really feel very blessed with such fantastic people around me.

Thank you all so much. Really thank you very much.

Photos up soon =)

2009-12-22T15:51:00.002+08:00

By the way, Taiwan was really a blast. I bought so much things and ate too much goodies. Photos will be up another time because I am quite lazy haha. My chemistry teacher said I did put on weight when I went back to return her her book yesterday. Time to go on diet already!

I don't like December. December is always dreadful for me. Bad things just keep occuring in this month. Its not exactly bad, its just that things don't really go the way I want during December, don't know why. That's why its bad! It makes me extremely moody. And it makes me say things to people which they don't like to hear.

And it affects my birthday.

However, this year my birthday is going to be different. I'm going to take things into my own hands. As what Heupseng had said, "You will only turn 21 once in your life." I'm not going to be emo and waste time during my birthday. I'm going to play paintball!

And its tomorrow! I can't wait. I can't wait to shoot my friends, actually. Haha.

2009-12-13T02:07:00.002+08:00

Wahahaha, enjoying life in Taiwan man!!

Shop and shop and shop until my pockets are burning!

Walk and walk and walk until my legs are burning!

Eat and eat and eat and my fats ain't burning!

The last time I weighed myself, I have gained 4 Kg!! There is a weighing machine here by the way.

Yes, I am enjoying myself now and its so sad that someone couldn't be here with me and be my tour guide. haha

Let me figure out how to upload photos then I shall upload some highlights while I am still over here haha!

2009-12-11T01:06:00.001+08:00

I'm flying off to Taiwan.

It's probably an escape.

I'm an escapist, prefering to escape then to do anything.

Overseas trips are always an escape for me.

But I know I can't escape forever.

2009-12-10T11:56:00.000+08:00

Self declared handsome boy, Mr. Yu came and accompanied me. Haha thanks so much for the company!!! If not I will be so lonely. haha

At the top of ADM building, too dark to see the grassy roof.

May thanks to chef Yu, we had cheese ramen with egg for suppers!!! Double cheese slices with cheese based soup (new flavour)! And a hidden hotdog hidden underneath as well! Wah, damn shiok but try not to cook raw eggs with noodles without the soup. You will get a layer of uncooked egg white. Haha

Using all the remaining eggs and hotdogs. I feel so honoured to have people cooking for me always! haha

A little surprised to Tan Huiyi...

Guess where this is? Ion Orchard. haha Finally, an outlet in Singapore!!!!

2009-12-06T13:36:00.002+08:00

I'm feeling fatigue from a lot of things, especially when comes to dealing with people.

I don't feel like doing anything. I don't feel like entertaining people or talking to people. And I don't feel like going to an extra mile for anyone anymore.

My relatives commented recently that I talked more when I was a kid and that I grew more quiet as I grow up. This is probably true and one day I may not even open my mouth anymore except for eating. I won't be surprise.

I guess disappointments I get from people everyday made me realised that there's no more hope in a happy wonderland. And disappointments coming from some people in particular whom I thought can give me hope just made things worse.

I'm not being pessimistic or emo. I have just started to embrace the harsh reality of life.

Since everyone is only bothered about themselves, I shall not expect myself to bother with anyone else from now onwards.

2009-12-04T02:47:00.000+08:00

Hiatus. Let me recover myself.

2009-12-02T00:52:00.001+08:00

Chandra Gupta, where are you?

2009-11-28T22:07:00.001+08:00

Everything has ended.

2009-11-27T23:46:00.002+08:00

My finals ended with a big bang. Well not exactly that big of a bang like the big bang theory, but big enough. It was quite happening until I can't stand it myself.

Let's see... after the last paper I immediately went for...

1. Refreshments with Yi Cheng at NTU Mcdonalds where I told him the grilled teppanyaki burger was a waste of money. So he settled for double McSpicy in the end. This is of course to celebrate my end of examinations while his will end on the 3 Dec. Hahahahahahahahaha...

2.4E7 Class of 2009 chalet. Thank you 4E7 for the lovely invitation to your chalet. Really had lots of fun. Murderer game and stuff. Its great to see your class still bonded. Hopefully it will remain as bonded as long as possible.

3 Played pool with 4E7 guys. I got trashed! Haha.

4. Watched the 2am New Moon movie with 4E7 girls. I thought the movie was to be out on 3 Dec? But anyway it was out already and it was really a ultra love-story movie.

5. Cycled all the way from Downtown East to Benjamin's house near Bedok MRT after the chalet to help Benjamin returned his bike home. His dog was really fun to play with.

6. Attended princess Bernice 21st Birthday Party at SAF Yacht Club. Really awesome! Thanks Zheng Yi for driving me to and back from there. Her whole family was really really cute. And there's this game where I was invited to play called "Are you smarter than Bernice?" The real winner in the end was the birthday girl which we felt was a huge conspiracy! Kidding la.

Haha! I'm not trying to action ok? I'm kind of tired now...

I got this upsetting phone call just now. I really don't know what's up with it. I don't understand why its getting so increasingly difficult to talk to you.

2009-11-23T21:22:00.005+08:00

Some irritating little boy Chun Long called me from his home town in Hong Kong just now. I couldn't recognise his voice at first. I was wondering, "Who is this stalker? Why did he suddenly call and ask me about my exams?" because his number appeared as private number on my phone. I was scared that it was someone who is doing survey or what la.

Haha, I think he's trying to action that he reached his home town already and he is going to eat dinner in a Hong Kong setting. Ok la, so nice of you to give me a call from overseas huh, give you chance, now I shall consider you as 有心 la.

Have a great time back at home! Cos' it always feels good to be at home.

I got 3 more papers left. Chiong~~~!

2009-11-23T00:41:00.004+08:00

Hanging out with friends whom know you for 8 solid years and counting always bring a sense of familiarity. It's like we grew up and saw each other through our transition from teens to adult hood.

I went to study overnight at Zheng Yi's place on Saturday night and it really brought back the days in sec school where we would study there for our exams (with Bernice) too. Though many years have passed, I'm glad that I'm still able to study there with Zheng Yi and to even ask him questions regarding Physics which I got no affinity for. Haha.

I'm kind of tired. Everyone's tired as well. Thank goodness my exams is one of the earliest to end off. Pros and Cons though, this results in my paper being back-to-back and I will have lesser time to revise for my subjects but for this semester, just let me end it as quickly as possible.

The first thing I'm going to do after my exams is to sleep. I'm going to slack away during the holidays. I shall shun away from all forms of responsibilities. And if possible, I'm not going to care about anything.

And hopefully I will pick myself up again to push ahead for the next semester.

2009-11-17T21:11:00.001+08:00

Seems like there's never ending bad news from you. As much as I am worrying about it, I still know things will eventually get better for you.

Keep in contact

2009-11-16T02:25:00.006+08:00

People say first impression counts. It's true to some extent but I would feel that the last impression counts more. For example, you felt that your friend is sickening the last time you met him. You will always think that he will be this sickening. And even if you both don't talk for a long time, you will still think that he is a sickening person. And for a longer time, he could be branded as a sickening person for life, a title which can be hard to revoke. Interestingly, you will just remember how sickening he is rather than to think how un-sickening he was when you first met him even if he was angelic. However, if your friend do something about his sickening attitude, your perspective of him could change.

Conversely, if everything ends on a positive note (not to the extent of goodbye hugs and kisses), I'm sure you will have a positive last impression of that person and that will stay with you. So if eveything ends with him being a sickening person, and the both of you stop any form of communications, then be prepared to let that impression stays. Unless you are able to psycho yourself to think that he is still as angelic as before than that's quite good for you. But don't overdo it or you will be deem delusional. If you are the sickening person and you don't want your friends to brand you for life, then start unsickening yourself.

You are faced with a situation where there are communcation problems, or so to speak from your perspective. And in your own opinion, you feel that you have tried every possible way to communicate with that someone. And also in your own opinion, you feel that that someone has done nothing.

What should you do? There are of course 2 rather opposing methods...
a) Be positive because as long as you perserve, you will find definitely see results. Haven't you heard that every cloud has a silver lining? Jia you, hang in there, gambate, hwaiting!
b) Forget about it and move on. You deserve better.

Option A is for highly optimistic people. Highly optimistic. There's nothing wrong with being so optimistic. It's good. You will be happy in a way. Option B is not entire pesimistic, in other words, I think that's called realistic. Don't hope on something which you know there is no hope anymore. You lost an arm in an accident, you don't hope for your arm to regrow because you also know it will not happen. You just have to accept and move on if not you will remain miserable.

If the two options are too radical for you to choose, then I present you with the third option. It's called waiting. The waiting game can be a very painful process because you are not doing anything. Don't you feel terrible waiting in a horribly long queue at a fast food outlet when you are extrememly hungry? In the waiting game, you will just be waiting if the other party will do something. You feel hopeful so you decide to wait, and yet you feel unhopeful so you decide to give it one last chance by waiting. So if you are the type who is extremely patient, this method could be better and less drastic. For me, I realised that patience for me is dependent on what period I'm living in. I can't expect myself to be so patient in situtations where it is nerve-wreckingly stressful. That's my weakness.

The question will then be, how long should you wait? If someone needs to keep you waiting, then you have to start considering what in fact are you waiting for? We often heard good things come to those who wait. But do we see ourselves waiting for our chocolate ice cream to melt in our hands before we put it in our mouths?

Siok Wen and I discussed over lunch about teachers, the teachers we had in the past. If a teacher is sincere in teaching, as students, we will be able to feel it. If a teacher couldn't care less about the whole teaching thing, as students, I'm sure we have seen it. The learning point is, it does not just applies to being a teacher. If a person is sincere to you, you will be able to feel it. Even if your heart is a mountain, it will still be moved by sincerity. So if you feel that someone is not sincere, more often than not, you would be right. Unless you are a person who sets unrealistically high expectations of those around you, then the problem could be lying with you instead.

I'm not afraid to let people know how I detest insincere people who acts sincere. I do know that I can insincere at times, well that's because I seriously could not be bother being sincere about it. And in such cases, I don't try to act like I'm very sincere, I will be just bluntly insincere.

Why bother to assure someone, "things will still be the same", when you know its not?

Why bother to say, "see you" or "ttyl", when you won't do it?

Why bother to apologise, "I didn't mean it..", when you don't mean it?

Why bother to "keep in contact", when you know you wouldn't sms or dial that person's number when you just prefer to laze around and do nothing. It just goes to show how much that someone means to you.

2009-11-15T02:58:00.003+08:00

This is what happens when room mates gets overly zealous about studying, sleeping, using the computer all at once.

I'm still off facebook, and the whole notion is pretty good because I don't feel tempted at all ever since. I will cease my MSN and Skype from now onwards all the way until 26 Nov. Remember, 26 Nov is the big day!!!

And a reminder, that temper/rage increases in a drastical exponential function as days get nearer to the finals.

No wonder I'm so vengeful these days.

Oh what the heck... just don't try to irritate me...